ONE YEAR

sometimes people don't understand when i say how i don't want Alana to grow up.
I just feel like time goes by so fast as it is and before i know it I'll be waving as she jets off to another country and all I'll have is a long distance phone call. I fear being my mother and i cant imagine how she let me go. but she did.
I can only imagine it being the hardest day of my life. letting someone you love more than life itself love someone or thinking else that pulls them away...


May 11th Alana will be one year old. just thinking about it makes me teary.
Tomorrow may 2nd we've having her hello kitty themed party. its pretty pimped out. obviously its more my party than hers. the house is already decorated... i can pretty much see her thinking 'what the hell?' when she wakes up.

She makes me so happy i can bearly believe how lucky and blessed i am that jujeh is healthy and happy. She gives kisses, loves to be chatty in bed, pokes my mouth and eye, she crawls, loves to read or just flip through books...whatever you want to class that as, she loooooves to eat adult food, she's a foodie, she loves babies even though she's still a baby herself and loves to go dah-dah. I think she's very smart. but then again what mother wouldn't say that about their child. maybe we just have a connection.... where we understand each other.

My daughter is soon to be one.My only hope is that she can grow up to get the best of me and mahan. Grow up to be strong, confident, compassionate, creative, nurturing, thoughtful, spiritual and happy.

Alana has made our little family funnier, our life more meaningful, our bills a little more expensive and my hope for the world more positive. when she's awake i find myself holding back from biting on her little chicken thigh, or squeezing her cheeks. Then she's a sleep i just look at her photos from when we was a baby. I awh-and eee... guess its part of being a mom. little obsessive.

one year down. many many happy years to come.
Happy birthday my little jujeh. [ jujeh - is farsi for baby chick. fyi ]